Women Rowing North by Mary Pipher

Author:Mary Pipher
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing

CHAPTER 11

Creating Community

“Develop skin as tough as a rhino’s hide. You cannot take anything personally. You cannot bear grudges. You must finish the day’s work when the day’s work is done. Don’t be easily discouraged. Take defeat over and over, pick yourself up, and go on.” —Eleanor Roosevelt

“Empathy … is the most revolutionary emotion.” —Gloria Steinem

Nora and Roger have lived in a small suburban community most of their adult lives. When they retired, they decided to do something to help their town. After some conversation, they realized that the entire community was without a park. So, they organized a group of friends to change that. This was a long-term project that required raising money, finding affordable land central to key housing areas, and working through the bureaucracy to get permits. Four years later their group was planting trees, buying fountains and playground equipment, and setting up courts for bocce and pickleball.

Nora and Roger planted a gingko tree in honor of Nora’s mother, who had died during the course of the project. They walked to the park every evening and greatly enjoyed seeing all the families picnicking. Long after Nora and Roger are gone, their suburb will have a place for children and adults to enjoy.

Action is the antidote to despair. It may or may not help the world, but it always helps us. Hope comes from engaging in a hopeful process, such as planting a community garden, donating time or money to good causes, or helping people in our polarized country respect and empathize with each other.

We older women are uniquely suited for community work. We have been accumulating skills for decades and have so many things we know how to do. Often we have lived in the same place for years and we know what the challenges are and how to work the system for the greater good. If we are lucky, we can be “connectors,” people who connect people to each other and to resources.

We have the wisdom of our years, knowledge of the world, and the time to tackle complicated, long-term problems. We can develop relationships with people in power and access information. We can help children, younger adults, and older people. With a commitment to do this, we have agency. The belief in our own power creates power.

Even those of us who are interested in global issues often find that when it comes to making a difference, we can achieve the most in our local communities. That is where we have the most knowledge, influence, and passion. Whether we are interested in governance, education, social justice, or environmental issues, usually we can be most effective when we work close to home.

Lynne was in charge of group singing on a retreat I attended at Ghost Ranch. She was a lively leader with a beautiful voice. At the end of the retreat, I asked if I could interview her.

Lynne was married to a man whose wife had died and left him with five children. Mordecai was a lifelong activist and community organizer in Philadelphia.

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